the power of prayer

i lay in bed troubled, but i needed to rest. i really needed to get some sleep. i closed my eyes, put my hands together and said a prayer. i prayed for peace, i prayed for him to take my worries, to ease the pain i felt in my heart. i couldnt stop crying from the moment my prayer started with "Dear God" i felt a release and inner peace when i said my prayer. sure i was choking on my words, but it really felt comforting that hes been here for me through it all. it felt like he was holding me in his arms. and these arms would never leave me.

i know that there are many friends out there concerned for my well being, being there for me. and i cant say enough on how i appreciate you guys. its really time that this hurt i feel comes to an end. its really time to learn to let it go, whether or not i have my questions answered, whether or not i assume my way to console myself. i really have to stop hurting cuz it gets very tiring. more so when im out partying, had a long night - and i get home to only feel the hurt even more. yes its true, all the partying and late nights out dont heal a thing. like what aloy said, i have to re-evaluate what im doing with my life and if i even want all this. i may enjoy it, love it, need it.. but i dont want it.

no crunking tonight then!! hopefully... ;)